There’s a Reason Why Lena Dunham is Receiving Horrible Hate Mail
Lena Dunham has been told that she is “fat, ugly and deserves to die.”
I read an article the other day about the writer and actor, Lena Dunham, who shared that she had received a lot of online hate messages as a result of her groundbreaking TV show, Girls. It struck me that the vicious comments were most likely coming from a very specific point of view — that of, “how dare you — a not-skinny woman — feel entitled to be a leading lady, an overtly sexual being, and a person who is comfortable showing your body on-camera?”
It struck me that these hateful comments, including, “You’re fat, you’re ugly and you deserve to die,” are coming out of a misplaced sense of outrage over Dunham being perfectly comfortable in her own skin, and not attempting to conform to the ridiculously narrow stereotype of what a “beautiful and desirable” female appearance should be.
In certain parts of our society, only a reed-thin woman with a standard type of face is “allowed” to be seen, and to see herself, as beautiful and desirable. When we ask, “who dictates this standard?” it’s clearly not anyone who loves, understands, or appreciates the wide diversity of women.
It’s also not anyone who respects those who might be attracted to women, because in severely limiting what is considered desirable, the standard-makers are depriving all these other people of the pleasure of a diverse selection of women to admire.
I remember reading a fascinating article a couple of years ago that showed pictures of dozens of models who were used to advertise certain products, like shampoo and face cream. The article had all the photos of the models lined up, and their faces and bodies were so eerily similar that they were essentially interchangeable. They all conformed to “a type” — a type that Lena Dunham — and millions of other women — don’t conform to.
Corporations determine what is attractive in order to sell products
From my experience, the decision on who sets the standard is simple. It originates in corporations run mostly by rich, middle-aged white men who decided a while back that a certain “type” was more likely to sell their products and increase their profits.
These men determined that this look, and only this look, was the standard of feminine beauty, and ever since then, they’ve been unwavering in their decision, at least until recent demands for diversity and inclusion have begun to affect their bottom line.
But even with the occasional nod to diversity in advertising and the media, the narrow beauty standard remains entrenched, and this is why it’s been still so difficult for anyone who doesn’t conform to the “type” to be taken seriously for a starring role in an ad, on TV, or in the movies, and it’s why Lena Dunham still gets hate. Once a precedent has been established, it becomes awfully difficult to shift.
The problem with this corporate-based standard of attractiveness is that representation matters, and what we see in the ads and on-screen becomes what we believe to be attractive. The corporate standard has trickled down into society where now, many people are convinced that there is only one way to be beautiful and desirable; only one type of appearance that signifies a sexy, attractive woman.
Corporate standards of “beauty” have trickled down into society
The corporate standard of beauty has become a collective belief about what is permitted to be represented as beautiful and desirable, to the point where certain individuals become outraged when a woman “dares” to ignore the “rules” and chooses to present herself as sexy and desirable, nonetheless.
Whatever you think of Lena Dunham as a person, an actor, or a writer, I find it interesting that almost every criticism directed towards her is about her appearance and her size. If people have legitimate complaints about her or anyone else, focusing on their appearance and their weight distracts from the real issues.
By the way, I am not against beauty. I am not against women — or men — wanting to be beautiful and desirable or to be seen as beautiful and desirable. I’m all for beauty; however, I see it as much broader than the corporate conception of bland, cookie-cutter sameness.
I think that there are all sorts of people who are beautiful, regardless of their size, their facial features, their race, their gender, or their degree of ability. When people are hostile to Lena Dunham for not conforming to this rigid standard of beauty, they reveal their own narrow-mindedness and their susceptibility to corporate brainwashing.
There are all sorts of ways to be beautiful and desirable
There is not only one way to be beautiful. There is not only one type of beauty. The wonderful thing about the world is all the diversity contained within it. We need to stop buying into the absurd notion of only one extremely limited idea of beauty.
Whether they know it or not, people who attack Lena Dunham on her size are imprisoned by rigid corporate-based values. They don’t even know why they’re so upset at Lena Dunham because they aren’t free to figure out for themselves what they find attractive and what turns them on.
These unfortunate individuals are being spoon-fed a corporate notion of “beauty” that they swallow down whole, without any question. How sad for them, and how sad for people like Lena Dunham, who are just being themselves and living their best lives.
If it weren’t for how abusive and distressing these hate messages were, I’d feel sorry for the senders, as the people on the other side of the hate mail are being told what to think and who to desire by corporate entities that care nothing about their happiness and only want to keep on profiting from their gullibility.
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